To all my friends and family...

May the dawning of this New Year, fill your heart with new hopes, open up new horizons and bring for you promises of brighter tomorrows. May you have a great New Year!

♥ E.

God Jul!

So...Christmas is over for this year. :) We were all very good and got lots of gifts. I got a lovely and warm retro-style (i.e. large "shawl" collar and big buttons) coat, bedding, a beautiful book of family photos, a gorgeous XXL fairy (have to try and and find a picture of it!)...was there anything else...? :/ Got money too, to buy the "right" thing, from dad. :) Kiddies got clothes and toys (jigzaw puzzles, remote control car) book, money... :) Plenty! :) Every year I think half would be enough... :) Oh! Anton and Erin are getting fish (in aquarium of course!) from me and Stephen too...! *lol* Stephen got a punching bag and gloves. :)

Dad was Santa as usual and I think next year we'll have to change Santa 'cause the kids suspected that Santa wasn't actually Santa but Vaari, dressed up as Santa...!?! Even Erin told me this morning that it was Vaari who was Santa... :/ ;) I mean, yeah...Julia might be big enough to start figuring things out but Erin's not even 3... It'd be nice if they believed in Santa for another little while. ;)

As always we had lots of lovely food, great company and a really good time! :)

I'm back to work at 7.15 tomorrow morning, getting ready for start of the sale...! :O Not stressing about that yet though... ;) Now I'm going to get myself some breakfast and see what the day will bring. :)

♥ E.

edited to add:
I completely forgot to mention that my dear friend over in Scotland, Nyki, had her baby on Christmas Eve! "McBaby" was a little Fraser! :D ♥ ...and I was certain it'd be a girl! ;) Congratulations and well done Nyki! xxx

Happy Holidays!

Once again life rushes past and I'm doing my best to keep up! School term is finally over and I've been working as well as studying the last two weeks. It's been surprisingly good to be back to work, didn't think I would enjoy it as much as I do. :)

Grades of the autumn term were surprisingly good too! :D MVG (passed with special distinction) on all but one of my courses. :D That one I wasn't sure I'd pass at all and I got a VG (passed with distinction) on it!? :D Super pleased with myself. :)

Christmas is just around the corner and I am as usual perplexed over the fact that it's less than a week away and I haven't got any Christmas:y things done this year either... :/ I take comfort in the fact that it'll be over before I know it and I'll stand here in April wondering what happened to the month of December! ;)

We're going to be staying with my mum and big sis over the next few weeks, it'll make my commute to work about a 3rd shorter, so when I'm not busy working I'll be busy being sociable with my family. :) Perhaps somthing to try to do more in the New Year...? ;) (I'm in the kitchen and S is in front of the TV!) *lol*

I'll try and pop in and let you know if Santa thought I'd been good this year... :) 'til then...

Iloista itsenäisyyspäivää!

Happy Birthday Finland!

December!?

Oh my goodness! Time flies and I haven't blogged in ages...

Anton had his check up at the nurse on Monday and got his eyes checked too. Got an all clear. :D There were other little things that he had to do too, draw, put peals in a string and tell the nurse what the boy in the book was doing. He, like Erin, speaks very well for his age and she had nothing to comment on at all. Mister Man's measurements at 4 years (+ a little bit) were 107 cm (3'1") and 19,1 kg (42 lb). Next check is at 5 years old, and then he'll get a jab too... :/ I can't remember what though...tetanus boost perhaps?

As far as the A(H1N1) jab...it seems like Anton and Erin are the only kids on their nursery group who haven't gotten it. Which is fine by me since they'll not get it from their little friends and no one should get it from our little ones... :)

I've also had a visit to my work, were I'll be working over x-mas...was a bit nervous but it very quickly felt like I'd not been away for that long (+4 years!). Even work"mates" that I barely remembered the names of knew/remembered me and gave me big hugs and a warm welcome. :) First proper day back to work is on Tuesday next week.

Otherwise...? Last weeks of school are just as boring and as stressful as usual and the fact that I'll be working half of the days I've got left in school this term is not stressing me any less.... ;) Oh well...! I've also gotten the acceptance letter for all the courses that I applied for for the spring term so now I have to decide which ones I'll not do... :( They all are SO interesting! Except the 2 that I'd rather not do but are "good" for me... ;) I might just do the math and skip the natural science but then again...both are good to have...

Today we're going to my "uncles" 50th birthday bash and we'll hopefully have and awesome time!
Time to get ready!
♥ E.

2 ½ year check up.

Every now and then kiddies go to the pediatric nurse for a routine check up, to see that they are "on track" development wise etc. They go less often as they grow but today it was time for Erin's 2½ year-check up, last one was at 18 months old. I think that this time around it was mainly the language development they were checking...

She got to draw, tell the nurse what the animals she was shown and what noise they made, which car was the small one. Easy peasy for our little miss! ;) The nurse said that Erin, linguistically, could easily be taken for a 3½ year old...! :) Then she got to kick a ball and was supposed to jump up and down with both feet together but she was not going to do that. ;) Being a determined little girl was a good thing according to the nurse. :)

Today's measurements were, 95 cm (are kids measured in inches or feet? I never learn...! 3'1" ) from top to toes :) and 15,8 kg (35 lb) "heavy".... :D

Next check up is at 4 years old, which is the one Anton's going to in two weeks... :)

We also talked a bit about the swine flu shot, which we've decided not to give the kids. It's not been an easy decision by any means but we've based it on what we've researched and our gut feeling. I'm not worried that any of us would get terminally ill if we were to get this "new" influenza. I don't know that this is the right decision but it is the one we've made...

I have been considering to take the flu jab myself, still undecided though... This is because I'm going to be back working in the department store over the holidays and I will be in a much more exposed environment than I've been for a long, long time... Again...I'm not worried that I couldn't handle the flu if I got it, it's just that I need to work and I'm still mainly the one "in charge" of running the household and it would be a pain if I was bedridden for even a few days. So, on this specific case pros are slightly more than cons... but as I said...still undecided...

Seems like one could go on and on about this flu... :/ No one knows, how bad is it going to get? When is it going to culminate? How long before we've been through the worst of it...?? What are the long term effects of this influenza and the vaccine???

Wishing you all good health and peace of mind, whatever your decision has been,
♥ E.

Got them back...! ;)

Mum was looking a little bit tired when we came to get the kiddies this afternoon. :) She very rarely wakes up that early (5:10!) and usually enjoys a good lie in at the weekends. She's quite a night owl my mum so even turning in "early" (about 1!?) is way too late for getting up with our ones. :D I bet she went to bed as soon as we'd left (about 7)! ;)

It was lovely having a quiet morning but after lunch I started feeling ready to go... I missed them...! :) All is as it should now, with Mister-man snoring away and hearing Missy-meeps talking in her sleep... :D

Thanks mum for giving us some time to ourselves and for your patience with our wee trolls...! ;)

♥ E.

tgif

We were done with our assignment for the week on Thursday so yesterday was a extra day off. *lovely!* Mum was working from home so we decided to pop by. Mum said if the kids were up for it they could get to stay the night, so we packed some extra stuff with us just in case.

Anton's been at mums once or twice over night but Erin has never slept away without having mum and/or dad with her so I wasn't sure how things would go. I mean, they meet their Mommo about once a week so I knew it would be fine if they decided to stay...I just wasn't sure they'd want to stay when we weren't going to. :)

No probs at all! :D We put on the usual "tgif"-movie with some snacks and said our good bye's... I was a little bit nervous 'cause it is still about a 45 minute drive home...and back again if they would be terribly sad at bed time...

When we were home again both Stephen and I were sort of..."what now...?" :) How sad is that...!? *lol* We opted for the sofa and a movie - twilight. Nice, both the chilling out on the sofa and the movie, which was really good! :)

Before we went to bed we figured out that the last time we both had a lie in together must have been 28th October 2005...! Because the next night my contractions started and two days later Anton was born. :)

Of course I "had to" check in on kiddies too during the evening and was told over msn that they were fine and that they'd gone down with no trouble to mums and spotify's lullabies... :) She sent me a photo to prove it too... ;)

It was a bit strange going to bed without hearing Anton's snoring and Erin's mumbling but I managed it... ;) and woke up hungry about 9. :) S is still in bed...

On facebook I read that our lovlies had woken mum up at 5.10! :)

Now I'm going to enjoy my morning coffee.

♥ E.

♥

Thanks Renee!

♥ E.

The stuff one finds on the internet..?! :)

On countless occasions I've stumbled across things I would have never read or known about had it not been because of the internet... Everything from tiny little gems that has lifted my spirit when I've really needed lifting, to truly awe inspiring stories that will stay with me forever. Sure, I probably would have spent some of the time I spend online doing better things for myself and the family but then again... I've gotten to know many truly awesome people online and they (and all the other "random" stuff online) have helped me grow - as a woman, mother, friend... :)

I can't even remember what I was doing (on MIS I think!) when I found this quote "You are a child of the universe no less than the trees and the stars; you have a right to be here. And whether or not it is clear to you, no doubt the universe is unfolding as it should..." I love finding quotes and poems and such so I did a quick search and found "Desiderata" by Max Ehrmann. I thought it absolutely beautiful... and just had to share! :)

♥ E.

Desiderata -

Go placidly amid the noise and the haste,

and remember what peace there may be in silence.

As far as possible, without surrender,

be on good terms with all persons.

Speak your truth quietly and clearly;

and listen to others,

even to the dull and the ignorant;

they too have their story.

Avoid loud and aggressive persons;

they are vexatious to the spirit.

If you compare yourself with others,

you may become vain or bitter,

for always there will be greater and lesser persons than yourself.

Enjoy your achievements as well as your plans.

Keep interested in your own career, however humble;

it is a real possession in the changing fortunes of time.

Exercise caution in your business affairs,

for the world is full of trickery.

But let this not blind you to what virtue there is;

many persons strive for high ideals,

and everywhere life is full of heroism.

Be yourself. Especially do not feign affection.

Neither be cynical about love,

for in the face of all aridity and disenchantment,

it is as perennial as the grass.

Take kindly the counsel of the years,

gracefully surrendering the things of youth.

Nurture strength of spirit to shield you in sudden misfortune.

But do not distress yourself with dark imaginings.

Many fears are born of fatigue and loneliness.

Beyond a wholesome discipline,

be gentle with yourself.

You are a child of the universe

no less than the trees and the stars;

you have a right to be here.

And whether or not it is clear to you,

no doubt the universe is unfolding as it should.

Therefore be at peace with God,

whatever you conceive Him to be.

And whatever your labors and aspirations,

in the noisy confusion of life,

keep peace in your soul.

With all its sham, drudgery, and broken dreams,

it is still a beautiful world.

Be cheerful. Strive to be happy.

Nursery photo.

Every autumn the nursery takes a group photo of the kids and we received ours in the mail last week. The photographer always does a really good job, rarely any silly faces or such, and this year was no exception. :)

♥ E.

Halloween and Birthday party

Erin insisted on me leaving her to put herself to sleep...! Hmmm... I'm giving it a go but I can hear her chittering away to herself...that's OK but if I hear bouncing in the bed she's had her go... :)

Tara's Halloween party on Saturday was lovely! We all had a great time. :) Nice to socialize for a change, and in English is such a bonus! :D

Erin was dressed up as a faerie and Anton was supposed to be a leopard but changed his mind just before getting ready to go. He wanted to be an "princess" too!! :O I had only loaned two outfits from my big sister and since A had a tantrum about wanting to be a princess, E quickly realised that she'd "gotten" the better deal (clever girl! ;)) and no-way that she was going to swap and go as a leopard instead...! *sigh!* :) So...what to do...? What other cool things could he want to go as, that I could "make" in no time...?? *panic!*

How about an...alien?? (he has no idea what one of those are!) Yeaaah! :D Since no one knows what they look like, Stephen and I grabbed whatever "weird" stuff we could find, put them on Anton and I painted his eye brows blue and TADAA we had us an alien! *lol!*

Saturday's party, which I'd dreaded, turned out better than I could have ever imagined! :D We were well prepped and organised beforehand. Family arrived about an hour before the little friends and we had time to catch up a little bit before the boys dropped in and played and ate and played and had some cake and played a little bit more before it was time to go again. No problems at all...just a few little tears which were all made better with a little blow and hug from his friend. *sweet!*

He got some really great pressies too. Duplo, Lego, games, clothes (Spiderman!) and the best one was without a doubt a Spiderman costume! :D No last minute changes today when they had a dress up party at nursery... ;)

Will update with photos soon!

♥ E.

p.s. She did manage to put herself to sleep! :D

Anton's 4 today!

Anton two weeks old, Nov. 2005

Our little man is not so little anymore... Today he turns 4! ♥
4 years old!?! I really, truly, honestly can't believe it...!

We're all organised and ready for family and little friends to arrive. :) I'm not as stressed now that we're all set up... ;)

Thank you Anton, for brightening our lives and giving Life a purpose. Love you! xxx

I'm no good at thinking of a suiting title for my blog posts.

Just two more days of my work placement and then back to school again on Monday. It feels...weird. Good, but sad ('cause I've really enjoyed working) and then a bit boring ('cause I'm kinda fed up with this course at the moment)...! But...mainly good, to get back to our "normal" routine with not-so-long days etc...but then again working (not living of a student grant) would be kind of nice... Clear as crystal, don't you think?? ;)

This weekend we've been invited to my friend Tara's Halloween "do" for our little people, my first Halloween party! :D I'm really looking forward to it, even if it's more for the kids than us grown ups.

I'm NOT looking forward to Anton's birthday...I'm so sorry, but I'm really not! He's turning 4 and having his friends over for his very first party. Before we've only had family over for a small celebration and I feel totally lost now, don't know how these kids-party-things are done... I wish I was this fun&games-mom but I'm not...! I like socialising but prefer to go away rather than having people (yes, even "just" little people") at our house.

I know I'm being silly!! I know! I mean...it's not such a big deal...it's not. But...I'm looking forward to Sunday evening, when it's all over and done with. :)

E.

Play-dates and so on...

Anton's growing up! Just one short week before he's a big 4 year old boy... 4?! Play-dates are rolling in... Yesterday he had C. over at ours and today E. called (himself! :) ) and asked if Anton wanted to come over to play. :) Which of course Anton was thrilled about! It didn't matter that Mommo was over... Kiss and bye-bye! ...She used to trump anyone and anything not too long ago... :) It is all the way it's supposed to be, I know...! I'm just having a hard time grasping that he isn't my baby anymore...he is a big boy! :)

Both him and Erin are in some sort of "testing boundaries"-phase... Or more correctly "let's not listen"-phase...! They are trying my patience something rotten and I can willingly admit to not always managing to keep my cool...! Not that it makes any difference at all if I if (when!) I get really cross...apparently it's sometimes even funny...!? :[ *not amused!*

Hoping this phase will pass quickly! :)

Tomorrow's Monday again...the weather forecast for the week is rain and mist. Hoping it'll clear and give us a crisp and sunny weekend. :)

E.

Church of Sweden says yes to gay marriage.

Great news for all those wanting to celebrate their love with a Christian union! :) ♥

From The Local.
"The Synod of the Lutheran Church of Sweden has come down in favour of church weddings for homosexuals in a vote held on Thursday morning.

The decision, which is based on a proposal from the church’s governing board, means that the Church of Sweden will conduct wedding ceremonies for both heterosexual and homosexual couples.

The proposal was approved by 176 of 249 voting members.

The decision comes just three days after the 30th anniversary of the date when homosexuality stopped being classified as a disease in Sweden.

“The Synod’s decision takes a stance in favour of an inclusive view of people. Regardless of whether one is religious or not, this affects the entire social climate and the view of people’s equal value,” Åsa Regnér, head of the Swedish Association for Sexuality Education (RFSU) - the country's largest gay rights group, said in a statement.

In June, the church board took the first step towards permitting same-sex marriages by submitting a petition to the Church of Sweden Synod – the church's highest decision-making body.

The board proposed the church continue to perform wedding ceremonies following new legislation which came into force on May 1st and grants same-sex couples in Sweden the same legal marriage status as heterosexuals.

Current church regulations will likely continue to apply in practice, with some alterations, such as replacing “man and wife” with “lawfully wedded spouses” when a homosexual couple is married.

Individual pastors would also still be able to refuse to perform marriage ceremonies for same-sex couples.

Since 2007, the Church of Sweden, which counts around 74 percent of Swedes as members, has offered gays a religious blessing of their union.

The ruling by the Synod, which has 251 delegates - two of which were absent from Thursday's vote, puts Sweden among the first countries in the world to allow gays to marry in a major church.

Representatives from the Catholic and Orthodox churches in Sweden, however, were disappointed by Thursday’s decision.

“It is with great sorry that we receive news that the Church of Sweden’s Synod has today decided to wed same-sex couples that it will be referred to as marriage. This is a step backwards, not only from Christian tradition, but also from all of the major world’s religions views of what marriage is,” write Vicar Fredrik Emanuelson of the Catholic Church and Father Misha Jaksic, coordinator of the family of Orthodox Churches at the Christian Council of Sweden (CCS), in a joint statement.

“We don’t wed same-sex couples in our churches and faith communities because doing so stands in clear opposition to the church’s tradition and to our entire view of creation.”

In moving ahead with the decision to perform same-sex marriages, the Church of Sweden also ignored concerns expressed earlier this year by the Church of England in a strongly worded letter to Swedish archbishop Anders Wejryd that the move could lead to “an impairment of the relationships between the churches”.

Church of England spokesperson Steve Jenkins confirmed that relations between the two churches may be headed for a turbulent phase in the wake of the decision.

“Those concerns remain,” he told The Local, referring to the letter from English bishops Christopher Hill and John Hind.

He added that he didn’t know of any plans by the English Church to issue a formal statement in response to the Church of Sweden’s decision."

Work, school and stuff.

So, week 3 (of 4) of my work placement has come to an end and I can't believe how quick it has gone! Only 5 more days of work and then back to school again...

My artsy assignment with the kids went really well! :) All of us enjoyed making a bit of a mess and the end results were really good! :) Taking over my supervisor's daily routines also, no problems at all. "Finally" my teachers visit on Thursday, all good! No "complaints" from me or my supervisor...

My cold is very persistent! Going from runny nose to cough to nose to throat and cough with runny...and so on and so on...
I'm thinking it'll stick for the rest of the work placement and another two weeks after that...since my immune system has to get reacquainted with the school environment again! *sigh* Oh well, I'm thankful it is just a cold and not anything that has forced me to stay at home. Also, my big sister said that she'd heard that if one has had the cold virus one's body is better equipped dealing with the "new" (apparently we're not calling it the swine flu any more) flu...! :)

On Monday this week I also got my application in for the spring term (more on my plans for the future here!). The total of points I've applied for is 600. I'll only need 400 (or possibly just 350?) for the spring term but a few of the courses (Creative writing and History of culture and ideas) that I'm really wanting to do might not get the go-ahead due to the fact that there's not enough interest. I've also applied to do more maths, natural science, philosophy, psychology and history... :D I'll have a hard time choosing which ones not to do if I'm accepted into all of them!

Not so great that I missed the cut off date for studying over x-mas/new year, i.e. getting my study grant over the school holidays. Which means less than half my study grant in December which in turn means that our x-mas/new year is looking kind of (very!)...poor...! :/ We'll see what we can do to sort it out, but...not looking great at the moment and it's really giving me a bit of a stomach ache thinking about it...

Ending on o positive note! My phone's fixed! S ordered the LCD-display from China for a fraction of the price it'd have cost me to get it sorted in Sweden and got it working again! :D He did mess up one of the speakers in the process but the phone works! :) SO pleased! :D

♥ E.

Snow and stuff...

It's been a while... I'm busy with my work placement and really enjoying it! :)

I have realised though, that I think I'm more of a school teacher than a nursery teacher. I'm not overly great with the discreet pedagogical way of teaching little people which the nursery staff are fantastic at. They manage to get loads of stuff, maths and so on, into childrens everyday playtime fun. I think I'm more suited at the more direct teaching that happens in a school environment...

Time flies and I only have two more weeks left. Next week my teacher is coming for a visit, I'm also going to be in charge (on my own but under supervision!) of an artsy activity with the kiddies and I'll also get to do one of the teachers normal everyday routines with mealtime, "nap"-time and so on... :) Busy busy...!

Last week we had out first snow!?! VERY early indeed and I have a feeling that this winter will be a cold one! I'm thinking - one for the record books kind of cold... :/

The kids went crazy when they saw the snow, which was more like sleet - but that didn't matter to them! :D It all melted away quite quickly but the mornings are very cold and frosty so it'll not be long before it'll stay... Also, winter tires need to go on the car a.s.a.p. or we'll not be able to get anywhere. :/ :)

I think it's time to get all the outdoor toys tidied away and make sure that the winter friendly stuff is close at hand. :) Project for today perhaps?

Stephen is feeling better too...getting on with the work downstairs. Feels like we're at the point where we're talking about fine tuning his meds rather than adding/changing to anything new. :) Looking forward to having this year over and done with.

♥ E.

No drama weekend...

:) Yeah...its been so rare lately to have a 'normal' weekend (without stress or irritation or tiredness and/or so on) so when one comes along, like this one, I feel grateful. Grateful for things ordinary, for everyday happenings like getting the house tidied together and going to see friends for a few hours on a Sunday afternoon... :)

It's also quite telling of the rough year we've had and...yeah... One should never take anything for granted but I miss being able to...

I'm grateful for being able to be grateful of the 'little things' and at the same time wishing I didn't need to be grateful... Not sure I'm making any sense...? :)

Anyhoot...! I've had a lovely weekend and I hope you've had one too.

E.

*sniffles*

I knew I was going to get a cold when starting my work placement at a nursery...! I mean... one grown ups, fairly untried, immune system has nothing to put up against a herd of little people mixed bag of germs. I thought was going to beat it by taking my echinacea pills (which usually works a charm!) before I even started work or had a premonition of a cold, i.e. last weekend, but noooo! 3 days into my work placement and I've got a runny nose (which about 86% of little people have) and nasty cough to go with it. No fever as of yet but today, day 4, I'm feeling reeeally rough! I'm hoping to make it 'til the weekend before I collapse in bed... really, really really don't want to be off sick when I'm only there for four weeks.

Aside from catching this cold it's been good! :) Kids are (mostly) lovely, staff's great and I'm getting into the swing of things...

Now my own little ones want my attention so I'll go and catch you up on the work placement stuff later!

E.

First day of work placement!

Last night, just before bedtime I started getting really nervous about my work placement. Had about a thousand "what ifs" in my head and really didn't sleep very well all night.

It felt like first day of school (but going all on my own!) going to the nursery and trying to find the right door. Of course I got the "wrong" one first (it was locked) and I felt embarrassed an awkward...! :)

Turns out to be a really good day. An outing to the woods nearby, some colouring and listening to stories etc and so on... :) I think it'll be alright! ;)
I have assignments to do during the 4 weeks I'm there but both my supervisor and I thought it'd be best just to get into the flow of things first before trying to get my schoolwork sorted.

Early start tomorrow and I can guarantee you I'll be in bed early too...!

E.

I suck!

*whining warning!*

:[ I suck! I DO! I really really do!

I dream of being this domestic goddess, doing homely things with no effort. Or at least to be some sort of an apprentice to The Domestic Goddess...! I love decorating and good food and freshly baked bread... I'd love to be able to do beautiful things with our garden and having a beautiful home would
(I imagine) give me great pleasure and a sense of pride.

BUT...!

I suck at any of these homely things I try and do! I can't bake, I can cook just enough to get us by. My attempts at sewing ends up being rubbish! (cause of this rant!) My gardening skills are enough to mow the lawn about half of the time it's "required" to be done...! :(

In my head I've got these great ideas and if my purse would allow me to sit and order people about we'd live in this gorgeous "country cottage"-style house with a lovely, purposely wild grown, garden.

But...! Since we don't have money growing of our badly managed trees in the garden I instead have bland, boring home and a sad looking garden which I'd rather not have to deal with, which shows since most of the time it's a right mess too!!

e.

Phone hassle and changes...

I think I've forgotten to tell you that my beloved new phone is (temporarily?) out of order. I managed to kill the screen when it slipped out of my hands the other week. The phone itself is still in perfectly good condition but the LDC-display does NOT like getting hit off the pavement. :/ Since I like to be able to see what I'm doing with the phone, rather than just guessing, I've returned to using my ancient Nokia. *buhu!*

The stupid thing is that it costs a fortune (or at least a stupid amount!) to get a new display for the phone...! :[ After doing some hunting on the internet S thinks that he can probably fix it himself for about a 6th (!) of the price we were offered.

So, I've been without my brilliant little camera for what feels like ages and I've not been able to take pics of either the kids or the progress of the rooms downstairs. The hallway is as good as done and looking fantastic! :D

I've also tried freshening up our dated, boooring, kitchen a bit with new covers for the kitchen chairs and getting matching curtains up... I did however find pics of the fabrics on the internet (yay for google images!) so I can still show you that. :) It's like a vitamin boost! :D Just childish enough to make me smile. :D

The fabric for the kitchen chairs is treated to make them easy to wipe down (akrylatväv) which is fab since the old cotton plaid fabric really was not very stain friendly. The apples and pears are a good size, roughly about 7x7 cm.

The cotton fabric for the (according to google translate, gardinkappa=) valance I'm (my mum's! ;)) making is a bit brighter (no pink and more red&yellow) than the one for the chairs and the apples and pears are smaller, about 3x3 cm... Could only find the fabric as an apron but thought it was still good to show the difference between the two. :)

It might seem a bit "crazy" of a choice but the rest of the kitchen is just sooo bland (beige/off white) that it needs a little crazy to perk it up! :)

I did take a before and after pic of the chairs with S phone and I'll add them here whenever I get a hold of his phone again! ;)

Edited Sept. 29th to add:

It's not the greatest photo but still shows the before and after quite well. The "before" chair was the worst of the bunch so maybe not a fair comparison but you see the difference...! ;)

E.

Anton

Yes, I blog in English but kiddies mostly (only) talk Swedish and they do say the funniest things and to translate is not the same and honestly too much of a pain just before bedtime! ;)

...
Anton har inte varit så intresserad av vart bebisar kommer ifrån eller döden och sånt förräns alldeles nyligen. Jag tror det måste ha kommit på tal på dagis för han har ändå rätt klara idéer.
Han vet att bebisar finns i mammas mage och att pappa "fixar" så det blir bebis i magen... :) Låter honom klura på saker o ting och försöker att inte "störa" funderingarna med mina tankar men ibland så får jag allt styra upp det lite... ;)

Anton satt brevid mig och väntade på att få spela sitt Dora (Utforskaren) spel på datorn och pratade på som vanligt. Så tittar han på mig med sina stora underbara blå ögon och säger med lite lillgammal ton på rösten;
"När jag blir stor ska jag fixa bebis i magen på Erin... Så att hon kan bli stor tjej."
Ehm... "Eh...Jaha...?" (och kunde inte låta bli att fråga) "Hur ska du göra det då?"
"Jag bara FIXAR det!" sa han stolt.
"Du kommer fixa jättefina bebisar Anton, det är jag helt säker på, men man fixar inte bebisar i sin systers mage... Du kommer hitta nån annan fin tjej att fixa bebisar med..."

Sen så bubblade han på om annat och så konstaterade han att,
"När man blir jättegammal så dör man."
"Ja, det gör man."
"Och när Vaari (morfar) blir jättegammal och dör så finns han inte mer..."
"Näe, då finns han inte mer..."
Så såg han lite smågrubblande ut så jag la till "...men, du kommer ju ihåg Vaari även om du inte ser honom - som nu. Så när han inte finns mer så är det ledsamt men du blir glad igen när du kommer ihåg allt roligt ni gjort tillsammans..."
"Mmmm! En gång fick jag hjälpa Vaari tvätta motorcykeln!" sa han glatt :)
"Precis så..." ...och så var han vidare på något helt annat...

Jag tycker det är så spännande vad han kommer på för något när han funderar... Samtidigt känner jag lite stress över vad tror/tycker jag egentligen och hur ska jag förklara det faktiska i "fixandet" när det slutligen kommer på tal...? ;)

Edited Sept. 29th to add:
After Nee's interesting online translation I thought I'd give my version of what was "said" above. ;) This is how I would have written it in English if I hadn't been too tired at the time. :)
------
Anton’s not been very interested in where babies come from or death or anything existential like that until just recently. I think it must have been brought up at day care because he seems to have fairly clear ideas...
He knows that babies grow in mommy’s tummy and that daddy puts them there. :) I try to let him figure things out himself and try not to disturb him in his pondering with my own thoughts but sometimes he does need a bit of help…

He was sitting beside me at the computer, waiting to play with his Dora (the Explorer) game and was talking away as per usual. He looks at me with his big beautiful blue, oh so innocent, eyes and says in a precocious tone of voice;
“When I’m a big boy I’m going to put a baby into Erin’s tummy…and then she’ll be a big girl.”
Oh…! “Ehm…really?” (and couldn’t help but to ask) “And how are you going to do that?”
“I’m just going to put it there!” he replied proudly.
“I’m sure you’ll have beautiful babies Anton, but you just don’t put babies in your sisters tummy. You’ll find another girl to make babies with." :)

He kept on babbling on and then stated that;
“When you’re really old you die.”
“Yes, that’s right.”
“And when Vaari (granddad) is really old and dies he’ll not be here anymore…”
“No, then he’ll not be here anymore.”
He looked somewhat puzzled so I added “…but…you know that you still remember Vaari, even if you can't see him – like right now. So when he’s not here anymore it’ll be very sad but you’ll feel better remembering all the fun stuff you’ve done together…”
“Mmmm! Once I got to help Vaari to wash his motorbike!!” He said with a big smile.
“Yeah…just like that.” :) …and then he was on talking about something else…

So what do you think...? ;) I thought the online translation was not too bad actually but this might give you less of a head ache...! :)

The future...!

It has been decided...Bam-Bam-BAMBAM!
I am not applying to Uni in the spring!

I'm still going to get my certificate in December, but rather than "stressing" to get my application in for the spring term (and thereby limiting my options both location- and concentration-wise) I'm going to wait and apply for the autumn term instead. I'm staying at Komvux (adult education) for the spring term, broadening my academic qualifications so that I'll have a better chance of getting accepted to the University of my choice (whatever that is!? ;)).

I feel (quite) good about making the decision. It has lower my stress a fair bit! :) I was getting quite worked up about the what and where and how and whatabouts of all the possibilities I was facing when getting to this crossroad in life. Now I've pushed that decision making into the future a bit. Not in a planless way of trying to get out of the making the decision, but more a mindful ;) approach, taking into consideration all that I have going on around me at the moment and what benefits I'm most likely getting form another 5 months "extra" studying before tackling the big and scary world of Higher Education...! :)

Bless that lovely school counselor who helped me sort out the mess I'd made of things when trying to sort it out by myself, in my head. Just talking about what I want to do and what my concerns are about my studies in the future he was very very helpful with guiding me in the right (hopefully!) direction...! :)
The point is, I feel much less stressed and that must be a good thing! ;)

So, more maths, possibly natural science, philosophy? and...more history maybe...for the spring term. Geography could possibly be a good idea but :/ hmmm...not really my cup of tea... Still have a few weeks to decide about that though! ;)

Now I'm off to bed and looking forward to an extra day off tomorrow. No school, no assignments due in just a day off from all the must-do's! :)

E.

What have you done in your life?

List from On the Good Life. If you want to play along, just copy and paste this list, highlight/change the font colour of the things you have done (mine are in pink) and let me know that you've posted it!

Here's mine:
1. Started your own blog
2. Slept under the stars
3. Played in a band
4. Visited Hawaii
5. Watched a meteor shower
6. Given more than you can afford to charity
7. Been to Disneyland/world
8. Climbed a mountain
9. Held a praying mantis
10. Sang a solo
11. Bungee jumped
12. Visited Paris
13. Watched a lightning storm at sea
14. Taught yourself an art from scratch
15. Adopted a child
16. Had food poisoning
17. Walked to the top of the Statue of Liberty (nope...but to the top of the Wallace Monument in Stirling ;))
18. Grown your own vegetables
19. Seen the Mona Lisa in France
20. Slept on an overnight train
21. Had a pillow fight
22. Hitch hiked
23. Taken a sick day when you’re not ill
24. Built a snow fort
25. Held a lamb
26. Gone skinny dipping
27. Run a Marathon
28. Ridden in a gondola in Venice (Thought it was too expensive. Walking was just as good.)
29. Seen a total eclipse
30. Watched a sunrise or sunset
31. Hit a home run
32. Been on a cruise
33. Seen Niagara Falls in person
34. Visited the birthplace of your ancestors
35. Seen an Amish community
36. Taught yourself a new language
37. Had enough money to be truly satisfied
38. Seen the Leaning Tower of Pisa in person
39. Gone rock climbing
40. Seen Michelangelo’s David
41. Sung karaoke
42. Seen Old Faithful geyser erupt
43. Bought a stranger a meal at a restaurant
44. Visited Africa
45. Walked on a beach by moonlight
46. Been transported in an ambulance (or been with someone being transported, on two seperate occations)
47. Had your portrait painted
48. Gone deep sea fishing
49. Seen the Sistine Chapel in person
50. Been to the top of the Eiffel Tower in Paris (the queue was too long!)
51. Gone scuba diving or snorkeling
52. Kissed in the rain
53. Played in the mud
54. Gone to a drive-in theater
55. Been in a movie
56. Visited the Great Wall of China
57. Started a business
58. Taken a martial arts class
59. Visited Russia (a day trip to Vyborg)
60. Served at a soup kitchen
61. Sold Girl Scout Cookies
62. Gone whale watching
63. Gotten flowers for no reason
64. Donated blood, platelets or plasma
65. Gone sky diving
66. Visited a Nazi Concentration Camp
67. Bounced a check
68. Flown in a helicopter
69. Saved a favorite childhood toy (a few actually... :) )
70. Visited the Lincoln Memorial
71. Eaten Caviar
72. Pieced a quilt
73. Stood in Times Square (no but in Piccadilly Circus!? ;) )
74. Toured the Everglades
75. Been fired from a job
76. Seen the Changing of the Guards in London
77. Broken a bone (toe, twice!)
78. Been on a speeding motorcycle
79. Seen the Grand Canyon in person
80. Published a book
81. Visited the Vatican
82. Bought a brand new car
83. Walked in Jerusalem
84. Had your picture in the newspaper
85. Read the entire Bible
86. Visited the White House
87. Killed and prepared an animal for eating (if you count fishing as killing? Yup! With some help, instructions, from my dad with the gutting :P )
88. Had chickenpox
89. Saved someone’s life
90. Sat on a jury
91. Met someone famous (I saw Sean Connery getting out of a car just a few yards infront of me...I was gobsmacked and couldn't get a word out. I count it as a meeting! ;) )
92. Joined a book club
93. Lost a loved one
94. Had a baby
95. Seen the Alamo in person
96. Swam in the Great Salt Lake
97. Been involved in a law suit
98. Owned a cell phone
99. Been stung by a bee

To all my mommy friends...

Read this article on Mums in Sweden and I just thought it was brilliant...! Thought I'd share it here with all mommy and mommies-to-be! :)
Let's all try and take the time to treasure the moments and rest assured that your way is just as right and wrong as any one elses...! :) Learn to trust yourself. ♥

E.♥

All My Babies Are Gone Now
By Anna Quindlen, Newsweek Columnist and Author

All my babies are gone now. I say this not in sorrow, but in disbelief. I take great satisfaction in what I have today: three almost-adults, two taller than I am, one closing in fast. Three people who read the same books I do and have learned not to be afraid of disagreeing with me in their opinion of the them, who sometimes tell vulgar jokes that make me laugh until I choke and cry, who need razor blades and shower gel and privacy, who want to keep their doors closed more than I like. Who, miraculously, go to the bathroom, zip up their jackets and move food from plate to mouth all by themselves. Like the trick soap I bought for the bathroom with a rubber ducky at its center, the baby is buried deep within each, barely discernible except through the unreliable haze of the past.

Everything in all the books I once pored over is finished for me now. Penelope Leach, T. Berry Brazelton, Dr. Spock. The ones on sibling rivalry and sleeping through the night and early-childhood education - all grown obsolete. Along with Goodnight Moon and Where the Wild Things Are, they are battered, spotted, well used. But I suspect that if you flipped the pages dust would rise like memories. What those books taught me, finally, and what the women on the playground taught me, and the well-meaning relations - what they taught me, was that they couldn't really teach me very much at all.

Raising children is presented at first as a true-false test, then becomes multiple choice, until finally, far along, you realize that it is an endless essay. No one knows anything. One child responds well to positive reinforcement, another can be managed only with a stern voice and a timeout. One child is toilet trained at 3, his sibling at 2.

When my first child was born, parents were told to put baby to bed on his belly so that he would not choke on his own spit-up. By the time my last arrived, babies were put down on their backs because of research on sudden infant death syndrome. To a new parent this ever-shifting certainty is terrifying, and then soothing. Eventually you must learn to trust yourself. Eventually the research will follow. I remember 15 years ago poring over one of Dr. Brazelton's wonderful books on child development, in which he describes three different sorts of infants: average, quiet, and active. I was looking for a sub-quiet codicil for an 18-month old who did not walk. Was there something wrong with his fat little legs? Was there something wrong with his tiny little mind? Was he developmentally delayed, physically challenged? Was I insane? Last year he went to China . Next year he goes to college. He can talk just fine. He can walk, too.

Every part of raising children is humbling. Believe me, mistakes were made. They have all been enshrined in the "Remember-When-Mom-Did" Hall of Fame. The outbursts, the temper tantrums, the bad language -mine, not theirs. The times the baby fell off the bed. The times I arrived late for preschool pickup. The nightmare sleepover. The horrible summer camp. The day when the youngest came barreling out of the classroom with a 98 on her geography test, and I responded, "What did you get wrong?" (She insisted I include that here.) The time I ordered food at the McDonald's drive-through speaker and then drove away without picking it up from the window. (They all insisted I include that.) I did not allow them to watch the Simpsons for the first two seasons. What was I thinking?

But the biggest mistake I made is the one that most of us make while doing this. I did not live in the moment enough. This is particularly clear now that the moment is gone, captured only in photographs. There is one picture of the three of them, sitting in the grass on a quilt in the shadow of the swing set on a summer day, ages 6, 4 and 1. And I wish I could remember what we ate, and what we talked about, and how they sounded, and how they looked when they slept that night.

I wish I had not been in such a hurry to get on to the next thing: dinner, bath, book, bed. I wish I had treasured the doing a little more and the getting it done a little less.

Even today I'm not sure what worked and what didn't, what was me and what was simply life. When they were very small, I suppose I thought someday they would become who they were because of what I'd done. Now I suspect they simpl y grew into their true selves because they demanded in a thousand ways that I back off and let them be. The books said to be relaxed and I was often tense, matter-of-fact and I was sometimes over the top. And look how it all turned out. I wound up with the three people I like best in the world, who have done more than anyone to excavate my essential humanity. That's what the books never told me. I was bound and determined to learn from the experts. It just took me a while to figure out who the experts were.

School and nervous about the future.

At the moment we're doing "occupational health and safety" (arbetsmiljö&säkerhet) and to get at pass we're all required to know how to perform CPR and apparently some simpler electrical "work" too! :/ :) The school janitor is going to help us out with that! *lol*
My knees are a bit tender after Fridays CPR-course...imagine having to do CPR on someone who's unconscious on gravel...? Ouch...! Better keep a well padded coat with me at all times... ;)

After going through the initial health and safety stuff we're going to get prepped for our 4 week work placement, in October, by learning "all" about childrens development (Förskola, Skola, Fritidshem). Looking forward to both! :)

----

I'm getting a bit stressed over what to do when this term is finished... I'll have my certificate (yay!) and I can a apply to university (applications are due in mid Oct.!? not sure how it'll all work out with the grades I'm still due to get...!) ...or...should/can I keep studying to boost my grades (and the final points which are important for getting accepted to the university) ...or...perhaps I should try (and find) work as a nanny for a while to see that this is definitely something I want to pursue as a "career"...? If I do decide to work I'll have to resign from my job at Åhléns, from which I've been given leave to study (not to work somewhere else!), and if I do that and then don't get enough "nanny-work"...? How will we manage...? So I "should" study instead...? Or...? Not...? But...? Perhaps...? Gaaaah!! :/

I don't wanna be a grown up!! :[

I know it'll all work out in the end but I'm sure I'll have an ulcer by the time winter's here...! *sigh*
How does one know which road to take...?

E.

CPR and AED

I've now got a certificate that I can perform CPR and use an AED! :)

E.

Another week flies by...!

Last assignment of the health education course was to prepare a short "class/lecture" for our classmates about something beneficial to our health, preferably with a practical exercise to go with it...anything goes (sort of), be creative! :) Main idea behind it is the planning and assessment of the work, a way of preparing to plan our time "out in the field" later on in the term.

There's been two full days (another half to go!) of classmate's, more or less interesting and more or less successful, "classes". My brain actually feels fried after all the relaxation exercises, what to eat and not and how our health/mood is affected by colour, yoga, balancing of chakras and the benefits of green tea and that's just the tip of the ice berg! ;) Good fun but...I think a group assignment (even if we'd done it in pairs) would have saved us an awful lot of time, 'cause it get tiring to just sit an listen to all these different things... Having to do just half the time would have kept all our interest up a bit better...feeling a bit sorry for the poor classmates that still have theirs left to do! :/ We were all a bit tired at the end of the day today, even though I think Helena did a good (?) job of balancing our chakras (?)... :)

My "class" was about mindfulness, to not dwell on the past or stress about the future but to try and live more in the moment. A fairly new concept in modern medicine where it is used to reduce stress, chronic pain etc. but practiced in Buddhism for thousands of years...

I heard the concept of mindfulness for the first time this year when I was looking into different types of therapy available for S and his bipolarity. I was reading about DBT (Dialectical behavior therapy), which is mainly for patients with borderline personality disorder but the mindfulness information that I found struck a cord with me. As something perfectly natural, for me, and something almost non-existing, for Stephen.

Since I was very young, I've strived to live by the motto "Carpe Diem" (seize the day) and to seize the moments of the day. To hear the birds, smell the coffee, feel the rain...it comes "naturally" to me.

There's a whole lot of other stuff to the mindfulness concept too but the core of it is to be able to pay attention (nonjudgmentally) to the present moment and to fully experience your emotions and senses, with perspective. ...Something that Stephen's always had a hard time to do...he's (as good as) always in the past or ahead of himself in the future. Whenever he is "in the moment" it's virtually impossible for him to step outside of himself and see what's going on from someone elses point of view. I'm not meaning to sound harsh! :) It's just the way it is and it made me very curious that there was an actual concept about something so...natural...! :)

I think my little lesson went over well with my classmates and from the assessments I got back seem like it was something they felt would be useful for them in the future, which feels good. :)

On Friday it's CPR (HLR) on the schedule...interesting! We're also getting to learn how to use an AED. I've done a course on how to do CPR on children before but not one for adults...

Sweet dreams!

E.

Books you've read...

A friend of mine had done this "Name fifteen books you've read that will always stick with you." on facebook and as I love to read I thought it'd be "fun" to think back on what I've read and what of it has stuck.

I'm usually always looking for the next good read... ;)

Not too trying of a task to pass a bit of time...??
It took me ages to do the list ('cause I decided to do a short "summery" of them as well! ). *lol* It felt good when it was done though! :)

This is my list, in English, even though I've read most of them in Swedish:

1. "The Red Tent" by Anita Diamant. Traditions and turmoils of ancient womanhood, a new view of the lives of biblical women.

2. "The Mists of Avalon" by Marion Zimmer Bradley. The Arthurian Legend retold through the eyes and lives of the women who wielded power from behind the throne.

3. "Hannah's Gift: Lessons from a Life Fully Lived" by Maria Housden. About how little Hannah fearlessly faces death and her joyful approach to living. How to truly live in the moment and break free from lives suffocated by too many unlived joys.

4. "The Road to Jerusalem" (+ rest of The Crusades Trilogy) by Jan Guillou. A fantastic "historical" thriller about a Swedish Knight Templar. My favourite combination - religion and history . :)

5. "Follow Your Heart" by Susanna Tamaro. A grandmother writing to her estranged granddaughter, a letter that might not ever reach its destination. A journey through generations to teach us some very important life lessons.

6. "Tuesdays with Morrie: An Old Man, a Young Man, and Life's Greatest Lesson" by Mitch Albom. The title says it all.

7. "Ondskan" by Jan Guillou. Couldn't find title in English, might not have been translated which would be a shame! A young mans fight against his abusers.

8. "According to Mary Magdalene" by Marianne Fredriksson. Fredriksson masterfully breathes life into the figure of Mary Magdalene in this triumphal novel of the life, death, and resurrection of Jesus Christ, seen through the eyes of the woman who loved him most.

9. "The Birthday Cake" by Sven Nordqvist. A favourite childhood story. Pettson is baking a cake for Findus who has three birthdays a year...

10. "The Tale of the Little, Little Old Woman" by Elsa Beskow. Another childhood "favourite", first published 1897. Very short and very sweet. :)

11. "An Unquiet Mind: A Memoir of Moods and Madness" by Kay Redfield Jamison. Possibly the foremost authority on manic-depressive illness is also one of its survivors. Powerfully candid, exceptionally wise with the power to transform, and save, lives.

12. "Veronika Decides to Die" by Paulo Coelho. Coelho questions the meaning of madness and celebrates individuals who do not fit into patterns society considers to be normal.

13. "La Cucina" by Lily Prior. A celebration of family, food, passion, and the eternal rapture of romance.

14. "Pope Joan" by Donna Woolfolk Cross. A portrait of an unforgettable woman who struggles against restrictions her soul cannot accept.

15. "The Kite Runner" by Khaled Hosseini. The unforgettable, beautifully told story of the friendship between two boys growing up in Kabul. A novel about friendship, family, history, love, war, guilt, forgiveness and more...

E.

What books have stuck with you? I'm not asking for all 15 but it'd be a good way of reading a "worth while" book next! :)

September!?

Here we go...again... ;) Where has the time gone!? September already?
In only two short months Anton will be 4 !?! I can't believe it...!

I do like that we're going into autumn, even though right now we've still got summer warmth outside. I love the cool autumn days, falling leaves, warm jumpers and gloves and scarfs... :)

Having no assignments today I've gone through the boxes of winter clothes and realised that Erin won't need anything new for outdoors. There's an overall, two warm winter coats a pair of padded "ski"-trousers + hats and scarves... Oh! She will need ONE thing...new gloves! :D SO grateful for the hand-me-downs Erin get from my nieces (and Anton). Some of the stuff have been worn only for a season and still look new! :)

In my linen closet, where I keep the clothes boxes, I also found a box of all our baby bedlinen that I didn't remember I had there. All those little blankets and quilts etc made me think...is that now an era of the past for us...? How long do I keep the boxes of baby linen and clothes before passing them on to someone else or to charity...?

I'd love to have another baby but right now is not the time and thinking ahead I don't see us finding that time either, at least not until I'm passed my preferred "best before date"... ;) I don't know... I doubt I'll ever feel "done" having children...? My sister says she's done...I believe her. :) I wish I would (will?) feel the same contentment...

E.

This weeks assignment...!

reflect on how the health, quality of life, habits and lifestyles (at the individual-/group-level and national/international level) affects our attitude to health, self-awareness and personal development...

Interesting for sure! Stuff for a good discussion no doubt...! ...but...I need to get it on paper! Where to start...? No here on blogger at least! ;)

E.

Brilliant afternoon/evening!

Yesterday was a beautiful sunny day and after hurrying to get my school work (almost!) done we headed off to Gothenburg and Liseberg for the first time this year. We got there just as the park was opening at 3 and stayed 'til just before 9. Kids loooved it! :) They weren't too keen on the rides this year either but did go on a few of the "nicer" ones. Cousins Elsa and Julia were braver and went on the kiddie roller coaster etc.

We left the stroller at home since Erin won't walk at all if we have it with us. I was a bit worried that she'd tire and we'd have to carry her but she was more than fine! :) Skipping and hopping still (since just walking won't do!) to the car when we left...where they get the energy from I don't know! ;) She fell asleep in the car within minutes, which I'd expected of them both but Anton kept talking and talking all the way home! He very rarely is up later than 9, especially in the car (!), and we were home just before 10...! :) A very very happy boy fell asleep in his bed after getting reassurance that we'll go back another day. "..not tomorrow or the day after, later..." xxx
Hope sister and brother-in-law got some good pics that I can post later!

Time to pic kiddies up from nursery! "TGIF" on the schedule later...! :)

E.

Health and quality of life...

So, the course I'm doing right now is a health education course and our first "assignment" is to reflect on what health and quality of life. What does it mean to me...? Interesting and hard to put into word...and I guess that's why we're having a discussion group about it on Friday.

Yesterday we had an out-doors day scheduled and our teacher was very secretive about what we were supposed to do. I know some people (our teacher) love that "excitement" but I just get annoyed! :P Alright, we are all hoping to work with kids in the future and they looove (and need!) surprises and excitement but we're NOT kids... Oh well...turned out to be a good day! ;)

We met up at this old cabin in the woods and the surrounding nature was beautiful! First "job" was to sit down and just enjoy the morning with a "fika". Our assignment for the day was to make our lunch (soup) in the woods. We got a bag of vegetables and some basic "tools" but had build a fire and organise the whole getting water and logs for the fire and how to make the soup etc. in our small groups...

I got the fire going for our group (liked that!) and all the groups managed to produce a soup by lunch time! :) Even though we all had and air of smokiness around us by the end of it I think we all had a good time and experienced a bit of good health and quality of life... :)

Alice, Njie and Fatme having a fika.

Hunger's setting in on our group. ;)

Awat stirring and other class mates enjoying their (apparently) very spicy soup.



E.

Quick update!

Back to school and on my lunch break. Realised that I've not updated the blog in ages...! Been sooo busy with the final stuff of "summer school". Not much time left over for anything else but studying.

Last week, on Monday, I had my final exam in psychology which I got an MVG ("passed with special distinction") on! :) Yay! Still don't know what my final grade will be though but well chuffed about the exam going so well. :) On my religious sciense exam I "only" got G ("passed") which I was disappointed with since all my assignments have been MVG... :/ Still have a small supplement to hand in there too and then we'll see...

After the exams were over we packed the kiddies and all our stuff in the car and drove up to Dalsland to my aunt's "cabin" were we enjoyed a mini holiday. Chillin' out... :) SO needed that!

Now I'm back to school and summer is officially over... :/ Still hoping for a good sunny days though and if there's room in my schedule we might go away for a long weekend or something... Nothing planned yet though.

Gotta go now! Break over! ;)
Be back soon with some pics hopefully!

E.

Sunshine!

Summer's returned after a good few weeks of rain rain rain and we've gotten to try the lake nearby for the first time after moving here more than 2½ years ago. It was GREAT! :D

Previously kiddies have only had a swim in the shallow lake near dad's summer place. That time Anton was more the keen swimmer and Erin was very hesitant (even though she did "warm" to it after a while) but on Thursday, when we weren't even sure if little-person-swimming would be possible, Erin's hesitation was gone! :) She LOVED it and Anton was the one happy to stay at the shore. Which is kinda good since S can't swim and I had my hand full with Erin. :)

Yesterday we went back to the lake again, now with all the swim-floaty things to strap around the kids. It was a wee bit cooler than the day before so I was actually the first one in! :) Anton was not that interested at all...very hesitant about whether he could trust the floats or not. He had a good splash about anyways. :) Erin on the other had looooved her floaty-ring which was just the right size for her. She held on really well and we went out a good bit and she was cool as a cucumber "swimyswimyswim!":ing! Super pleased with herself and sooo cute! :)

I have also made a "stance" that wasn't really much of a free choice but I still feel good about doing it! :) I've gotten myself a bikini, and I was using it too...in public!?! ;P
I would have preferred a one piece bathing suit but there was none. At first I was trying to think of what other options I had to use for swimming and none of the options were at all appealing... So I got myself the bikini and I thought I'd feel mortified at the beach but there was no one pointing fingers and laughing at me and whoever saw me probably never gave me a second thought and if they did...so what...! :) I look just as big in a two-piece as in a one-piece so why worry about it...you know...?
I'm just a mum-of-two at the lake with my family and it's about time I stop giving a damn about what other people think!! :D I'm just a good and bad as everyone else...

E.

Berries!

Our garden's full of berries - loads redcurrants and raspberries...the blueberries need another week or so and the wild strawberries have all been eaten for this season. ;)
Stephen had planted some peas which should've been good to eat in another month or so but "our" deer thought the flowers/plants were very tasty so there's nothing left of them! We'll need to protect the plants a bit better next year. :)

E.

August!?

:O On Thursday I looked at our wall calender and realised that July was as good as over...! Were did the time go...?? Now it's August already (!) and in two weeks I'm "back" to school again, with "proper" classes and schoolmates etc. Honestly, not looking forward to it at all... :/

I'm starting to feel the air going out of me slightly...not having had any real time off for a year. Short breaks here and there but not a holiday... I'm starting to crave a break, just to be for a bit, and not constantly do stuff.

Stephen's home now and seeming better, mood is lighter and hopefully the change in his meds have done him good.

I've been worrying a bit over the affect Stephen's illness will have on our little ones and I try to keep a close eye on them to spot any kind of worry or stress...nothing so far (more to the contrary in fact!) except the perfectly normal missing daddy when he's away...
The mum of one of Anton's little friends told me, when she was dropping him off after a play-date, that he's so good and easy to deal with and secure... that truly warmed my heart! :) What mother doesn't worry about their child not feeling secure in the world...? With S gone so much lately I've not felt sure that I'm enough for them...
Looking out the window now and seeing how well they play together and how good they are to each other I feel so blessed and grateful. I must have done something right...??

E.

More play dates!

Here we go! :) Once it's started there's no going back... ;) On Tuesday Anton was over at Erik's after nursery and still managed to be up 'til 9.30!? Don't know where he gets all that energy from, I'd like some of that please...! :)

On Wednesday Calle's mum called again to ask if Thursday morning would work for another date but I just had too much school work to have Erin home and sending her to nursery by herself just didn't feel fair...so we rescheduled to tomorrow instead. :) She got Erik's mums no. too so perhaps all three will get together and play...?

Today I'm getting a play date of my own! :) A friends coming up from Varberg with her girl, Saga(same age as Anton), and her new baby boy, Ted. I'm so craving that baby smell...! :D Hope he gives me a good wee cry too and I'll be in heaven...! ;)

Better start getting ready!

E.

Total Solar Eclipse!

I'm not sure how to add a video "window" to the blog so I'll just have to post the link to it instead. It's an 8 minute long video (on youtube) of the total solar eclipse of 22nd July 2009. They're speaking Chinese or Japanese of something "similar" but it's still cool to watch! Mum travelled to China for it (and other tourist:y stuff too!) and has hopefully had just as good or better view of it! :)

E.

:)

Calle's mum was very sweet both picking up and leaving Anton home again so that I didn't have to take kiddies on the bus. With the horrendous weather we've had today I SO glad she did! :)
Since he opened his eyes this morning he was asking when he would go, when he would get picked up and was he going now...?? *lol* He was not impressed when I told him he needed to eat lunch and have his nap before going to Calle's...! :)

I was a bit..."worried" in case Anton would be a bit shy and not settle in to the fun and want to come back home after no time at all. I didn't need to worry about that though! :D They'd apparently had a brilliant time and 4 hours later he was returned back to me...I had started missing him...! ;)

Just as Anton was being picked up another mum to one of his other nursery friend called to see if Anton would want to come over... :) Timing couldn't be worse but glad she called,we'll definitely organise something soon...perhaps tomorrow...?

Erin and I had some very rare mum&daughter-time! Lots of kisses and cuddles with no interference...she asked where Anton was a few times but seemed quite happy to not have to share me! :)

Time to start getting kiddies ready for bed...where did the day go? :)

E.

Psychology and Religion...

My head's totally muddled up at the moment!
I'm really enjoying my new courses, both are very interesting in their own way but not so sure it was a good idea to do them both at the same time.
At present I'm reading about the different psychological perspectives (behaviourism, cognitive, biological etc. etc.) which is very interesting. The Religion course is all about analysing and contemplating about...well religion... :D which is also very interesting but it's hard to switch from one to the other. I've tried to plan my schedule so that I do one subject a day rather than mixing them both (if not necessary) and its going alright...but my head still kind of spinning. Perhaps Religion and Philosophy would have been a better "match"...

Anton's going to his first away-from-mommy-play-date tomorrow! :) One of his friend from nursery was wanting to meet up which I thought was a really good idea... Anton was thrilled when I told him he's getting to go to Calle's tomorrow! :D They're such good little friends and being away from each other for 4 weeks (the time nursery is closed over summer) is a looong time at their age. I hope all goes well... :) My little man's growing up!

What else...S was home for a few day and will probably visit again after the weekend...we're taking things slow...

Sweet dreams!

E.

June/July pics!

Getting a "proper" go on the bike + Missy Fluffy Hair.

Barefoot No-Helmet on his bike and our Ray Of Sunshine. ♥

E.

"Passed with distinction"

...or VG in Swedish (see academic grading in Sweden) is what I got after finishing the horrendous exam last Friday! :D Yay! Well done me! ;)
I sat for 10 hours straight and then another 1-2 hours finishing it in the evening...! Madness! Got it done and did it well... ;)

This Monday I started my course in religious studies and in psychology. Already feel that it's a much lesser pace which feels good, what I need right now.

E.

p.s. Stephen's not been feeling good the last week or so and yesterday he went back to the hospital... I don't have all the details yet since he was sent there after seeing his doctor at lunch time. S just called to let me know where he was...more than that he wasn't up to talking about.

Done already!?

Hmm...already done with this weeks assignment which feels fantastic but at the same time worried about how much studying we're expected to do before the final exam...?? I mean... I've gone though my notes and all the assignments again to prepare for the exam and I feel like I know the stuff quite well...so what else can I do...?

Having my lunch now and wondering if might have missed something... The exam worries me quite a bit... Since my school is online we get to download the exam and it has to be returned after 24 hours. I understand logically that we're not expected to write for 24 hours straight but how much time is reasonable to give the exam...? I feel a bit stressed over the whole uncertainty of it...oh well... *fingers crossed* that it all goes well anyways! :) Wish me luck!

Lately I've been thinking (panicking!) about going to university/college in January (last date to apply is mid Oct.) and after being SO set on getting a teaching degree I'm no longer sure. It might just have to do with the future being more permanently set after starting uni...I mean, I know I can change my mind but I don't want to keep studying forever and... I want to get it right from the start!

The reason I want to teach is because I think it's one of the most important jobs in the world and I've been lucky to have a few truely awesome ones (and a few really bad ones) and I think I could possibly be, perhaps not awesome but, a good one... I love kids, their openness for new things and for learning and exploring and I'd like to be a part of that "magic".

I'm really not sure what has put doubt in my mind about if teaching is for me...but something, just the other week, made me think in a new direction... I still want to work with children but perhaps I might be better at listening than teaching...? Working as a school counselor perhaps? That would mean I'd have to get a degree in social work (socionom in Swedish) and unfortunately it's, as far as I know, fairly difficult to get in to that program...and the job prospects in the next 5 years (when I would have my degree) are not nearly as good as for teachers... I don't know... it'd be important to still work with children...and there's no guarantee for that...? I just don't want to be stuck in an office, a disgruntled social worker... :/

I don't know...of course I'll need to look into it some more and nothing stops me from applying to both but I just feel a bit baffled over my quite sudden "change of heart"...which really isn't a change but...yeah...you know what I mean...?? :/ :)

Looong lunch break today! ;)

E.